A Day in the Life of a VSO Volunteer
on Adventures in Nepal (Nepal), 21/May/2010 16:22, 34 days ago
Wake upI am in NepalLandscapes filled with thikkas, mantras, bright colors, the unexpected, contemplated government overthrows.And rice.If you have not eaten rice today you have not eaten.I came here to do.To act, to change, to learn, to ask, to help transform, to be transformed.But so often I find myself falling between the cultural cracks.Today I am faced with silence.Surreptitious looks over newspapers. A quiet evening. Questions not answered.We are trying so hard to understand one another.But my western assumptions are colliding with your eastern patience.No matter. Learning happens through discomfort.And anyways, I have found there is a lot that happens in the silent spaces.Silence happens right before creation.But I will not lie. It is unsettling to me against the din of my former life.As unsettling as clumps of chickens hanging from bicycle handles and thewoman in the village who looks at me pleadingly.Her husband has her under her thumb, she says. Her children don't have food to eat.What can I do to help?Lissim grabs my arm and smiles at me afterwards.She also doesn't know what to do or say.With her touch I am momentarily calmed.I don't know where we end up.But I know we begin with truly listening, honoring suffering.Then gathering forces. And Lissim's hand on my arm tells me she's invited me onto her team.My thoughts about movement, change, silence and action are interrupted.By laundry that needs to be washed.Food that needs to be bought and carefully prepared.A dusty floor that needs to be swept.So far I've only found two life and two dead cockroaches in my dera.And even though this has nothing but luck of the draw, it somehow seems like a personal accomplishment.Thich Nhat Hahn says that these tasks are also our spiritual work.To be done well, consciously. Meditation.I have been really considering this.I have plenty of time and opportunity to consider this.And indeed, the water I wash my clothes with relaxes my mind easily and quickly.For this I am grateful.But I can't help but think that sometimes the laundry, floors, and washing of lentils can also be a diversion.Tonight I will sleep early so I can be awake for the noises of the morning.I have given up my natural rhythm of sleeping in late not without a fight.But have learned - in the spirit of following the path of least resistance - to welcome the sounds of people starting their day.Chanting, chopping, washing, playing, spitting, cleansing, cleansing, working, working.These noises come early, quickly, and loudly here.I feel guilty for not reading and being studious tonight.But not for long.The rest is welcome.And the moon in the night sky is calling me to her.I secretly hope for thunder and rain and puddles on the floor as I go to bed after washing off the day's heat.I need all the rest I can get anyways.I have to be prepared for whatever will come tomorrow...Sitting silent, watching, learning, planning my next move.Thinking about how to balance flexibility with consistency of action and purpose.It takes all the energy and focus I have.And this must be what I came for.