No Expectations
on The Ghana Experience (Ghana), 04/Sep/2010 10:40, 34 days ago
22 August– 1 September 2010I want to be philosophical while writing this but when I say this I amexpecting something out of me and as I get drifted with the process Imight not be what I expected me to be. I wanted to write something butI could not because I just kept on postponing it as I felt that therewas nothing happening worthwhile. Writing on a blog also starts with apurpose and then one gets addicted to fulfill the purpose. The thingthat is meant to be. Sometimes I felt"am I bound by that purpose butthen it occurred to me that I am the one who decides on the purpose."Then more introspection leads to the thought,"Am I the slave of ME?"or"is it something different which drives me along". No I don't wantto say that it is"God" because I am not religious person but I don'twant to be atheist as well because I have not came to the realisationthat the thing the people call as God does not exist.It all started after returning from long trip of Accra and Kumasi whenvery few things which are worth mentioning in the blog happened and Istarted to feel bored with life in Bongo. It started to feel like myususal life in India as I attended some village meetings, preparedreports and they all started to look same to me. Not anythingdifferent than the ones which I was doing in India. Then I was invitedto attend one marriage on Saturday and I was excited not because I wasgoing to attend a local ceremony but because it was going to besomething different than what I was used to in India and it wassomething worthwhile to write on the blog.After attending the marriage I was disappointed to a great extent. Thething which they were calling as marriage later turned out to be anengagement. It was conducted in a rented hall. The catholic priesttold that it was going to be traditioanal ceremony but there were someprayers and blessings etc. The only thing traditional was the ritualwhere bride was given by her family to the groom's family and groomsfamily then gave the bride to the groom. It was holding of hands ofbride and moving her from one person to the other. Food was good andthey served wine and drinks. Actually there was nothing to getdisappointed about this whole event but I was because I expectedsomething. I expected that it will be a very traditional northernGhanaian affair with lot of dancing, lot of people and traditionalafrican religious rituals. I was expecting it to be something on thebasis of a mental picture which I had drawn and in turn which wasbased on my vague thoughts about African people and not realknowledge. There were very few people, the ceremony was conducted withChristian customs, there was not much of dancing because bride did notlike it. Still everybody was happy about it and I was disappointed tosome extent. My disappointment got developed because I expected it tobe something which it was not.While I was getting disappointed I had failed to understand that daythat when the way they celebrated it was completely new to me. Ifailed to appreciate the things as they were. I realise now that manytimes expectations about reality not the actual reality dominates ourthoughts. Is that the cause of suffering? A new philosophical questionfor sure!