The Real Meta Sangyang
on Lynn Sellwood (The Gambia), 05/Mar/2011 11:04, 34 days ago
The weird thing about being in The Gambia, which is so unlike anywhere I have ever been before, in that, it is in Africa; very poor (14th poorest country in the world); Islamic; and yearning for "development", is that I feel at home in so many ways. It makes no sense at all so I have been wondering why it is.There are things I miss about home, the most important being my family, but I have to say they are doing a great job of pacing their visits to me; other things I miss include cold milk, flavoursome cheese and hot showers. I’ll never get used to the dreadful litter, people spitting in the street, overly loud and off key calls to prayer in the early morning; being called “Toubab” by passing children and “Boss Lady” by random young men, and the dreadful bumsters who can truly test your patience when you are having an off-day. And, I’ll be forever grateful that I have been bought up in a democratic society where I am able to voice my opinions with no fear of reprisals.So, I have come to the conclusion that my happiness and contentment is to do with the people I have met as well as the weather, the pace of working, and the landscape. I have made good friends with fellow volunteers of all ages and enjoy good discussions about politics, culture and the future. I have taught a fellow volunteer, Courtney Gardner, to knit so, another example of sharing skills!Knitting and Purling! I am full of admiration for other people who have come to work on a project to benefit their fellows whether it be Mick and Jenny in BeeCause or Geri and Maurice in Sandele. They have got two guys, Sam and Ben, from New Zealand looking at the ancient tradition oftadelaktwhich acts as a sealing coating for walls.Lots of trial mixturesI have made friends with Gambians and despite me being used to working in a different way, I really like my colleagues in SQAD and in the Ministry of Education. I am also is awe of the women in The Gambia, who work so hard and have fantastic attitude to their lot. They are responsible for the home, the children, the vegetables and they have to earn money as well.First, fill your buckets! You rarely see a woman idle in The Gambia.Now that I am getting to know people better I am able to have conversations about seemingly controversial subjects. I have been probing the background and realities of polygamy. In Gambia, under Islamic law, a man is able to take up to 4 wives. In discussion with men it is patiently explained to me that this is because men have“needs” which can’t be met by one woman. Some men expect their wives to live together in one compound; others will provide separate compounds for each wife. When I question whether the women are consulted things get a little hazy and in the end I am told, this is our culture and the women "understand".My women friends however voice something different. One second wife I know describes how she is torn to pieces inside when her husband spends a night with his first wife. In telling some women the other day that my own mum and dad will have been married for 60 years this August, they both said that they wished that it could be the same for them but it is not their culture. There is an acceptance that they are set different standards to men.I have got bolder and have now started conversations about FGM (Female Genital Mutilation) which I was immediately told by a man that should not be called“mutilation” but instead called Female Circumcision. It was the 8th anniversary ofInternational Zero Toleranceto FGM on 16th February. Some counties have legislated against it but there is no such legislation in The Gambia. Indeed, there is a courtcasegoing at the moment where the leading Anti-FGM activists, Isatou Touray and Amie Bojang-Sissoho were arrested for allegedly embezzling funds despite an earlier investigation which cleared them of all charges.In The Gambia, estimates are that approximately 75% of the female population undergoes one form or another of this procedure. It can vary from the clipping of the clitoris, to its full excision and can also include the removal of the labia as well as the sewing up of the vaginal orifice to prevent pre-marital sex. (A small gap is left for urination and menstruation). This closure then has to be opened again upon marriage. This procedure is often performed by women in the bush but there is a more worrying trend for the procedure to be performed in hospitals, which tends to justify it by making it safer. I just wish we could name and shame such“doctors”. While women concur with it as part of their culture, it is actually fathers who decide whether their daughters are subjected to the procedure.I was told by a man I know that although this is not part of Islamic religious teaching it is closely bound to the culture and that I needed to understand that women needed to be protected from their harmful sexual desires which could lead to the destruction of family life if they had a desire for another man. In effect, taking away sexual pleasure was "good for them". He then told me he had consented to having his own daughters subjected to this and when I said“Shame on you, this is the 21st century, and you aspire to join the developed world.” I clearly had gone too far and had upset him.Now I am about as tolerant a person as you could find about how other people live their lives but this attitude and belief has started to get me down. It really bothers me that this is an example where female equality in The Gambia is light years away from western standards and that somehow men use all their powers to keep women subjugated. Women are suppressed in marriage through the polygamy laws and in their sexuality through FGM and yes, it is mutilation, not circumcision. It is an abuse of human rights where women are denied rights to health, bodily integrity and sometimes even, life.Yet it is the women here that give me enormous hope. A group of traditional singers and drummers (they are a group of barren women, I was told by a Village Elder) entertained the new VSO volunteers in Ndemban, where I got my name and where I met for the first time the original Meta Sangyang.Women's WelcomeInterestingly, this village is one of the first in The Gambia to outlaw such harmful traditional practices. They have protected the status of the women who performed the procedure by ensuring they maintain their status as wise women.As an admirer of Hillary Clinton who has been quietly and determinedly pursuing an agenda of feminist issues in US foreign policy, I have been following her career under Obama. She has challenged the abortion of female foetuses in China; sexual violence as a weapon of war in The Congo and elsewhere; women’s rights in Afghanistan and countless other areas. She has asserted that the rights of women and girls are core to US foreign policy and women’s issues are integral to the achievement of every goal of US foreign policy. I just wish I could imagine William Hague taking the same line. This quotation is apt on so many levels.........."Nearly all men can stand adversity, but if you want to test a man’s character, give him power." Abraham LincolnSo, this is a controversial blog and not like the others I have written. I am very happy to be in The Gambia because it has exposed me to the realities of other people’s lives. Please leave a comment.....I really want to know what you think. And, please let me know if you want to send money or things for Campama school and cricket development in The Gambia. Unfortunately, the charity "Sunshine with Smiles" and I did not share the same outlook so I have withdrawn from them and I am simply trying to help the school and the cricket association with donations from friends and family.