It's All Over Now, Baby Bula
on Me Talk Pretty One Day (Malawi), 22/Oct/2008 10:58, 34 days ago
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No longer will I be laughed at for my methodical, lumbering slowness or my inability to walk on the ceiling. No longer will I be taunted or abused for my grotesque size or my lack of a tail. No longer will Chilambula Road, that elusive little albino gecko who has defeated and demoralised me night after night for the last few weeks, reign supreme over this house. For tonight, I struck a mighty victory against my formerly formidable opponent and left the poor gecko stunned and totally bewildered.It all happened so quickly. While working at my computer I began to feel a little hungry so I stood up, turned around, and made my quiet way towards the biscuit tin. In retrospect, it was all very much like some fearful predator stalking its prey out in the African wilderness. On entering the kitchen I flicked the light switch and that old incandescent bulb erupted brilliantly into life. There was a thud, and from the corner of my eye I saw something fall behind the hot-plate. I pounced. The hot-plate went one way and the water filter went the other, and there, at my mercy and totally exposed was none other than Chilambula Road.I could have trapped the gecko beneath the old coffee tin. I could have grabbed it with my bare hands. I could have brushed it into the sink, broken its neck or squashed it flat. But in the end, I did none of these things. Bula had been a worthy adversary, and as such, I allowed the defeated to regain its composure and scurry off, tail firmly between its legs. Having previously been so gracious in defeat, I made sure to be magnanimous in victory, for it is said that the only thing worse than a bad loser is a bad winner. Besides, Bula eats the bugs and I am grateful for that.If I see Bula again, I will let the coffee tin rest, but I know that both the gecko and I will smile at the memory of what was a truly gargantuan battle, a battle that ended so suddenly one quiet evening with a chance trip to the biscuit tin.
