In Which Someone Is A Thief As Well As A Liar
on Zoe Page (Sierra Leone), 30/Oct/2010 20:45, 34 days ago
It’s amazing how time passes when there are no commercial reminders in the shops. Halloween isn’t done here: no pumpkins, no trick or treat, not even a day of the dead with spectacular shrines.Today it is proved that landlord Mr Barry is a thief as well as a liar. On the second point, he said when I moved in that he would shortly come and remove the pile of junk he called a car. Seriously, this is a pile of metal with 4 flat tires and a shattered windscreen. 4 weeks after I moved in, he finally comes for it today. He is most annoyed as he calls and calls me but my phone is charging elsewhere in the house and I don’t hear it. So he hammers on the metal gate instead, shaking it back and forth as if he’s a robber trying to break in. Becausethat’sgoing to make me hurry down and open it. There is a hiccup with the keys (no one has them) so they wander off and eventually come back. Along with two side-kicks, he plays at being a man, putting the key in, turning the steering wheel, but even my novice car brain knows it’s not going anywhere.He gets out of the car...to give me a bill, just as I’m thinking I should have charged him for a parking space for the last month. This is the water bill, and he reluctantly lets go so I can read it. I soon see why: he said it was for 70 000 Leones, but the bill, though hand-written, is quite clear. It is 35 000 Leones a month, and there is a month’s arrears on it. I explain that since I wasn’t in the country, let alone the house, for most of September, I will not be paying that, but he can have the money for October. He huffs and puffs but tough. Then he changes tack again and asks how Junior is getting on in the house and if he is being helpful. I feel like this needs to go down to caveman level:Me, volunteer. Me no have money to pay cleaner. Me no want cleaner. Me no have job. Me have plenty of time to sweep floors. Me not letting creepy neighbour boy get his hands on my knickers, even under pretence of washing them.The men laugh, but it’s not a joke. This is bordering on harassment now and the more they go on about it, the more I am inclined to warn my future housemates off ever calling on his services. In fact I would actively encourage them to seek out someone else on principle. You do not get my custom by nagging me until I cave.After I hand over cash and they tow the car away, I come inside for lunch and a monster thunder storm. It’s so loud I can’t even listen to podcasts because the thrashing rain drowns them out. It is only 2pm but it is dark as anything, and I have to put my light on (electricity bill ‘to come’ promised/threatened loopy landlord). Cold and dark and rainy. Suddenly it feels like the end of Octoberafter all.