AI YO!
on When I'm 64 (Sri Lanka), 06/Feb/2011 11:53, 34 days ago
    A couple of weeks ago I got a text from my priest friend Patrick telling me that Fr. Peter had had a heart attack and died the night before. I met Fr. Peter only 2 times, as a matter of fact, I wrote about the night I met him on one of my blogs from here, I'm sure. I had dinner with him, Patrick and another priest in their headquarters in Colombo. There is so much I don't remember in my life, so many meetings and dinners but this one has stayed with me because it was so unique to be with priests and to laugh more than I had in a long time. Mainly responsible for the laughter was Fr. Peter. He was short and stocky, intelligent, educated, sarcastic, irreverent and very funny. Our humor matched so well and we bantered thru the whole dinner. Honestly I think I fell a little in love with him that eve. The next day, out of kindness, he came to the VSO office with the train tickets I had been unable to obtain. Those were my only encounters with him in person but he is not someone I shall forget.    So I have had a Sari blouse made for the Sari I never intended to wear. I was now going to wear it for the opening of our new hospital wing which was supposed to be tomorrow, monday; I would take a picture, all would see. Alas, that event has been postponed and I shall miss it. In any case, it's so typical of here. The hospital director told us not 2 weeks ago that the opening was scheduled for Feb. 7. That was the last any of us heard about it. I finally texted the Director on Friday who sent me back a text on Saturday saying sorry, it has been rescheduled for the 21st! So I have my blouse but what was funny was trying it on with the nurses after I got it. I picked it up and was then on the ward and several nurses said they wanted to see it on. I took off my shirt and they all started giggling and laughing. This year has been a real learning in trying not to be paranoid, not to take things personally and not assume things even have to do with me. Between the language, the culture, basically usually not knowing what's going on, any of the above is easy to happen if I don't watch it. I assumed they were laughing at my bra which looks very different from the ones they sell here. In between laughing and tugging at the blouse and hooking it, everyone checked the blouse out which is very pretty and has tight sleeves but at least they are 3/4 length. They approved. Finally they told me that they started laughing when they saw the bottom part of my back because it is so white! I am a "white" after all even though most of me has a tan.p    Over the time I have been here, 14 months now, I have had various reactions to the lack of enthusiasm of several friends to the idea of Skyping. I have found it a miracle for me. It has made it possible to feel my connection especially to my family and to feel less isolated then I actually am. I have asked, begged, pleaded, gotten annoyed, puzzled over, became resigned, gave up talking about it with several friends in my life. I, after all, am the one away, in a strange place, without friends and family. Accommodation should be made! Honestly I just figured, out of sight out of mind, that is what is happening for people. Actually, that may be true for some and really it's OK. I am no different. I didn't consider though that Skyping could cause pain to others, that it might be too difficult, cause sadness or other less then positive reactions..it's complicated and I was selfish, human. It does feel good to know that my presence is missed by some and that I shan't come home to a friendless existence!    My major companion is my cat, Baby. She is adorable and is now bringing home birds and rats to play with! We also now have the company of the cat who I met almost as soon as I moved in, when I thought there was a strange animal in the house and it was this cat from across the lane. She has now taken to coming in several times a day. The other day I wasn't paying attention and put a can with some tuna down for Baby who had just come in..you guessed it, when I actually looked, it was the other cat. Oh Baby has a new trick, she has found a way to get to a shelf that is almost at the ceiling, it is used for storage. Her favorite new trick is to hide out there and about 11:30pm, when I am asleep of course, she jumps, landing on all 4 paws, with a thud next to me in bed.    I feel my work here has been successful. I am happy and feel things will carry on. There is new stuff coming up but the staff know what to do. The other day, as part of the Friday training program, the staff and patients put on a musical extravaganza and several little plays. It was so wonderful, and all the patients and all the staff participated even just by being present and watching. I had nothing to do with it's planning, it was a nurse and the OT. I am redundant, yeah!    I have finally persuaded the female nurses to teach me some dirty Sinhala words. They are very shy, laugh, leave the room but I now have 3 in my repertoire. I decided to teach them something too. There is an expression here, ay yo! It means, oh no or uh oh trouble or something like that. I use it all the time and then I realized, it has the same meaning as oy vey! These people didn't know what a Jew was when I arrived. The staff are now saying oy vey! when appropriate and I keep saying ay yo!