Getting on with Life
on Blog From Beyond (Rwanda), 26/Nov/2009 14:37, 34 days ago
Ah, I was reluctant to post this because it knocksthe postwith all the pictures of D., Cathryn, Martine, Jasmine and Ruairi off the end. Feels like 'letting go' - and I'm not quite ready to do that ;)Being back is still a bit weird. It's now been one month and two days.There's a whole bundle of things that still freak me out, several things I thought would but haven't and a few unexpected things I never even thought of:The speed of trafficLiquid milkDrinking water from tapsFridge freezersRunning waterHot waterBeing able to understand absolutely everything everyone is saying (even when you'd rather not)The difference in what people consider to be 'a problem', 'stressful' or 'hard done-by'Broadband - I absolutely love it - the novelty still hasn't worn offSandwiches and the sheer quantity of food available all day every dayDaylight hours - no longer the predictable 6am-6pmThe cold, damp weather (I used to love autumn but since being back I don't like the smell of mulched leaves :o/)Overwhelming amount of media: TV, radio, papers, billboards, magazines, wide-screen, high definition, surround sound....Having no social life - friends regularly say 'come and visit!' they rarely say 'here's the petrol money' ;) - with no income, it's a no-goThe above isn't such an issue as I find I really like being on my own a lot - it's hard to relate your experiences, especially when people ask 'so, how was Rwanda' - well, how long have you got? And then glaze over and talk about the patio after the first two seconds...The affection people have for animals - I think it's nice, but sometimes a little eccentricThe fact that peopleareeccentric, hedonistic and alternative - that's a good thing to an extent; the amount of diversity (spiritually, sexually, intellectually, culturally)The shattering of illusions that Britain is an 'efficient' country ;) - I think you spend a lot of time huffing, puffing and saying 'this would never happen in the UK!' - when in fact it does, regularlyHow quickly you start to slip back into it all. If other people hadn't been there with you, you'd start to think it were all a dream...So, that's a couple of the major things that have been occupying my thoughts.The other main one has been 'employment'. It's a bit sucky not having a job.Today I decided to try and remedy that. I thought 'if I can't get a job, I might as well invent one' - I was mostly thinking about delivering training courses to local NGOs - I can cover just about anything from Fundraising through to Project Development. Not to the highest echelons of Prince2 (but what is that, other than common sense?) but for what grass-roots organisations need I'm savvy. Although given the current financial crisis, none of them have much of a budget for training :o/Still, bread and butter potential. Perhaps.I also wanted to do some talks to raise money forTabaraandVSO. So all of this culminated in the decision to buy a projector as no-one locally hires them out and hiring out tends to end up more expensive in the long-run than buying one. Speculate to accumulate and all that.So I did some browsing and discovered a really good deal online for£185. But I did my research (what, being a researcher and all...) and discovered a slight hitch in that the product came with a brand of lamp nobody else had ever heard of before - so if the retailer stoped trading, you'd be a bit stuffed.During my digging I came across a lovely lady called Mel atAuthority AV. She was so nice that within the hour I'd phoned back and bought an NEC NP110G projector, which should arrive tomorrow. I'm quite excited.My master plan is that even if I don't make much money from training, I can still hire out the projector to help towards the cost.So. That was my initiative. Put together some workshops and training sessions, sell myself like a...well, person who sells themself, and at least it would help ease the cabin fever and get me out of the house.At exactly the moment the payment went through for the projector, I received a query asking for my 'salary expectation' for a job in Cairo, and 'could you start immediately'?Isn't that always the way. Just when you think you've got yourself sorted, a whole world of 'what if...' lands on your doorstep.So the next three hours were dedicated to researching living costs in Egypt - of which I still don't feel any the wiser. So if anyone has any advice, that would be wonderful.It's an editorial job with an NGO - from their blog I'm not sure it's doing so well financially, which may be a factor in the salary stakes. At the same point I'm overqualified for their specifications and it's about time I was earning some money (after two years as a volunteer you need it). It's a tough one.I want out of Disability and this is certainly out of Disability and into Editing and International Relations, which could be fun. But I don't know so much about the NGO and it's a 1-year initial contract (with option to extend) without flights home, so... I dunno. Is it better to go for a higher salary knowing they'll probably say 'no' and hold out for a job that will say 'yes', or do I want to spend a year in Egypt on a low income but with plenty of time to carry on writing my second novel and seeing the Pyramids? ;)It's a really tough call. I don't know. I said 'I want out of the UK', I also said 'I want out of Disability!' - this is out of both of those. So why am I hesitant? Over money - that shouldn't be an issue, anything is better than a volunteer allowance. Or is it location? I've never thought of working in Egypt - but then I never thought of going to Australia or Rwanda, and I enjoyed both of those places a lot.I dunno, dunno, dunno, dunno. It's always that question of whether the dream job will walk around the corner any minute now... But what's one year? If I survive it, I'll be back in time for my 30th birthday ;)And all this procrastinating without even getting an offer. This whole 'salary expectations' part is doing my head in. I know what I'd like to say in GBP, but in Egyptian Pounds... beats me. Are they expecting a local wage? They also haven't mentioned health insurance, national insurance contributions, accommodation.... which would all affect my price, and I'll have to ask them about those.Hmmmm.In addition there's a job down the road here: temporary two-month part-time with a national Deaf network. I'm applying, I may get it - I live very close. Would be a nice way to ease into things working part-time and trying to set-up my training idea....I suppose, in comparison, Egypt does sort of sound quite nice. But then, the realities of Africa are different from the package holiday experience....do I want to beMzungu!again so soon?Enough waffling. I'll put my suggestion forward (as soon as I know what it should be) and the rest will probably be figured out for me. Maybe it'll be a 'no', maybe a 'yes' maybe a 'you have GOT to be kidding!' - no point thinking too much until then.But I have to say, it is flattering to have interest at last. After so many no-replies. Even the Cameroon offer last June was nice to get, despite the money being too low to live off. It picks you up just when you start to feel the whole job market has you black-listed ;)Mostly I've been filling my time with the great On Line. I don't think I will ever in my life be able to take Broadband for granted again. If it were a food product I'd be rolling around in it naked.Sadly though, it brings with it such sinful delights as internet shopping, and thus my bank balance is taking a knock ;) I found a totally decadent and not-in-the-least-bit-related-to-global-development site calledFashionFace TVand have been having fun with eye-liner and blusher. Just one of those totally wonderful experiences you can have in the West with video streaming and a Boot's card. It's nice to do something for no other reason than 'it's fun' :)Also been keeping one eye on Rwanda with Google news alerts. Including aplane crashat Kanombe. I read a few reports of this and apparently what happened was that the plane was safely guided back to the parking bay but just as it came to a stop the auto-throttle switched on and the plane ran straight into the VIP lounge, reducing the Rwandair fleet to one plane for fears of a design fault.Meantime,former Rwanda official warns of violence. Interesting, but you can't help thinking that everything ever written about Rwanda in the media becomes terribly sensationalised. What's wrong with expressing concerns about the reconciliation process without headlines like 'genocide will happen again!'? It is possible to criticise something without completely writing it off, or to suggest improvements without saying it's all a total failure.But then, that wouldn't make CNN prime-time would it ;)Anyhoo, I'm aware this has been a bit long-winded and me-centric today. What is there to say except: 'giz a job, eh'.Although there is a meal on the 11th run by the Northampton Returned Volunteer group, which should be nice - although most of them have been returned the past fifteen years apparently :op Still, would be lovely to have some friends, especially ones who don't entirely glaze over at the mention of overseas development issues ;)